Would or wood?
Me or I?
Is, am, are, was, were?
To comma or not to comma?
Does the word need an apostrophe? (don't ask me)
To or too?
How do you spell a word when spell check has no clue?
These are all things I contemplate when writing. I am NOT an English person so let me establish that first. I stood for a few years while teaching in English teachers rooms and tried to glean from them all the knowledge that should be standard for a sophomore but I had yet to pick up because I am a little behind and probably didn't pay attention "that day" when I was a sophomore myself. I tried really hard to learn more than I did already know.....but I seriously think I failed. I am no better today at figuring out where a comma should go, how exactly should I use that apostrophe, or if I should use me or I than was back in high school.
The English language is so complex and yet most of the world picks it up as a second language. Ever call in the middle of the night to have something serviced? That probably isn't an American you are talking to. So how is it possible if most of the world is trying to master my language as a second I still can't get it all straight as my first? Why can't I remember the simple rules of grammar? Why can't I spell simple every day words?
I have no answers to my questions and as much time as I spent lately contemplating "to" or "too" you think I would have come up with one. So for now I leave you with this, if the brwn cow crosses' the rode, wile I were drivin' the greane tractor, he mite git hit.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Things I Learned "On The Farm"
Things I learned or now cherish about growing up Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday's (and a few other sporadic days thrown in along the way) in Western Oklahoma....where the wind really does sweep down the plain. Thank you for loving on this big city girl!
1. The smell of red dirt after a field has been plowed is the best.
2. The red dirt never comes off new white shoes.
3. Hoeing peanuts at 7 am is better than at 12 noon. (do you know that peanuts grow in the ground?)
4. Hoeing peanuts at 7 am is best done with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (learned this from Jawanna House).
5. Sacking peanuts is not for the weak. (didn't have to do that many times)
6. Basketball is a sport.....and baseball.....(thanks boys for letting me play)
7. Some people really don't lock their doors.
8. Cows are scary (sorry....never got over the cows).
9. If you open your home to a preacher, his wife, and kid they will come over. :)
10. Cedar Hills Baptist Youth Camp is NOT just for learning about God.
11. I know how to flick the heads off of grasshoppers. Don't judge.
12. Dr. Pepper.
13. A small town that you can walk to the country store and still get a glass Coke bottle is the best.
14. You WILL drive 45 minutes to Walmart.
15. People really do love living in the sticks.
16. Wild mushrooms can taste like steak.
17. Deer season is a religion.
18. When your grandma and grandpa are 2-3 hours away, God will provide ones to step in. (Miss you Grandma and Grandpa Schimmel......ear tugs!)
19. Holding hands with boys is fun. (oh.....I am an idiot for this one some times....don't laugh Neely!)
20. There is this dressing they used to serve with chicken at the local stops.....they don't make it like that around here!
21. Youth Rally's are less tortuous with friends.
22. Sitting in a canyon talking about life with friends is priceless. (Thanks Neely!)
23. Wrangler butts are really nice to look at.
24. Food. OH the food! Thank you for feeding me and teaching me!
25. Allergies flare when the wheat is being combined.
26. If the wheat has to come off, the peanuts have to be dug, or the cotton has to be swathed, there will be a low attendance at church at I think that is OK with God.
27. Moving irrigation pipe must be one heck of a job and farmers have to do it often (who knew).
28. Farm kids don't get to the "big city" much. What I thought was every day was a treat.
29. All kids could drive before me....WAY before me......
30. The wind NEVER stops blowing so buy the extra strength hairspray.
31. Take a wet wash cloth in a baggy and a jar of water with you were ever you go. (Grandma Schimmel....oh Grandma Schimmel.....)
32. The Schimmel, House, Taylor, Bates, and King families are forever written on my heart. Thank you to all the families who loved on my family when we needed it. You took us into your homes and lives and made us apart of you. You taught me more about life and how to love others more than any one group of people could. Your homes, land, churches, and family are forever etched upon my heart....like the red dirt, I will never rid myself of you.....nor would I want too! Ear tugs and love to my Western Oklahoma family! :)
1. The smell of red dirt after a field has been plowed is the best.
2. The red dirt never comes off new white shoes.
3. Hoeing peanuts at 7 am is better than at 12 noon. (do you know that peanuts grow in the ground?)
4. Hoeing peanuts at 7 am is best done with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (learned this from Jawanna House).
5. Sacking peanuts is not for the weak. (didn't have to do that many times)
6. Basketball is a sport.....and baseball.....(thanks boys for letting me play)
7. Some people really don't lock their doors.
8. Cows are scary (sorry....never got over the cows).
9. If you open your home to a preacher, his wife, and kid they will come over. :)
10. Cedar Hills Baptist Youth Camp is NOT just for learning about God.
11. I know how to flick the heads off of grasshoppers. Don't judge.
12. Dr. Pepper.
13. A small town that you can walk to the country store and still get a glass Coke bottle is the best.
14. You WILL drive 45 minutes to Walmart.
15. People really do love living in the sticks.
16. Wild mushrooms can taste like steak.
17. Deer season is a religion.
18. When your grandma and grandpa are 2-3 hours away, God will provide ones to step in. (Miss you Grandma and Grandpa Schimmel......ear tugs!)
19. Holding hands with boys is fun. (oh.....I am an idiot for this one some times....don't laugh Neely!)
20. There is this dressing they used to serve with chicken at the local stops.....they don't make it like that around here!
21. Youth Rally's are less tortuous with friends.
22. Sitting in a canyon talking about life with friends is priceless. (Thanks Neely!)
23. Wrangler butts are really nice to look at.
24. Food. OH the food! Thank you for feeding me and teaching me!
25. Allergies flare when the wheat is being combined.
26. If the wheat has to come off, the peanuts have to be dug, or the cotton has to be swathed, there will be a low attendance at church at I think that is OK with God.
27. Moving irrigation pipe must be one heck of a job and farmers have to do it often (who knew).
28. Farm kids don't get to the "big city" much. What I thought was every day was a treat.
29. All kids could drive before me....WAY before me......
30. The wind NEVER stops blowing so buy the extra strength hairspray.
31. Take a wet wash cloth in a baggy and a jar of water with you were ever you go. (Grandma Schimmel....oh Grandma Schimmel.....)
32. The Schimmel, House, Taylor, Bates, and King families are forever written on my heart. Thank you to all the families who loved on my family when we needed it. You took us into your homes and lives and made us apart of you. You taught me more about life and how to love others more than any one group of people could. Your homes, land, churches, and family are forever etched upon my heart....like the red dirt, I will never rid myself of you.....nor would I want too! Ear tugs and love to my Western Oklahoma family! :)
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Buying A New Car
Seriously. No Seriously. I mean REALLY. Does buying a car have to be SO hard?
Over the last few weeks I have driven about every sedan in the under $30k range. I can tell which seats are hard, which seats are nice, which interiors are European, which interiors look like a Ford, which cars are built in the same factory as another car, which salesmen are lying (most of them), which salesmen are nice, which places will want to deal, which ones won't, etc, etc, etc. It is getting RIDICULOUS!
I have finally made a decision. I would post a picture but since I still need lessons on how to do that (please help me if you know how) I will just tell you it is the Hyundai Sonata. I would prefer black, so I have to wash it every day, but will also settle for silver, dark grey, a Pacific blue, or white. I can tell you we do NOT want a $2000 dollar navigation system since I only go to Walmart, Emma's school and church. I also want leather seats, a sunroof, and would prefer if it drove itself....OK....well....maybe I am not serious about the last part....but wouldn't that be nice.
The problem now is finding said car. Do you know, KNOW, how hard it is to find this picky American woman who has more wants than needs with this car? Do you KNOW? I would curse right now but my mom is watching. Let's just say that if I have to deal with one more sales person I will die with the car I have right now.
So cheers car sales people......y'all are seriously about as bad as the plague. We love to hate you and I guess for now I am hating you more than ever. Raise your glasses and solute yourselves. You deserve it!
Over the last few weeks I have driven about every sedan in the under $30k range. I can tell which seats are hard, which seats are nice, which interiors are European, which interiors look like a Ford, which cars are built in the same factory as another car, which salesmen are lying (most of them), which salesmen are nice, which places will want to deal, which ones won't, etc, etc, etc. It is getting RIDICULOUS!
I have finally made a decision. I would post a picture but since I still need lessons on how to do that (please help me if you know how) I will just tell you it is the Hyundai Sonata. I would prefer black, so I have to wash it every day, but will also settle for silver, dark grey, a Pacific blue, or white. I can tell you we do NOT want a $2000 dollar navigation system since I only go to Walmart, Emma's school and church. I also want leather seats, a sunroof, and would prefer if it drove itself....OK....well....maybe I am not serious about the last part....but wouldn't that be nice.
The problem now is finding said car. Do you know, KNOW, how hard it is to find this picky American woman who has more wants than needs with this car? Do you KNOW? I would curse right now but my mom is watching. Let's just say that if I have to deal with one more sales person I will die with the car I have right now.
So cheers car sales people......y'all are seriously about as bad as the plague. We love to hate you and I guess for now I am hating you more than ever. Raise your glasses and solute yourselves. You deserve it!
Friday, February 11, 2011
Summer
Dear Summer,
Will you be my boyfriend faster than normal? I know you are fast, furious and come on to me like a hot locomotive most of the time. Please, please, PLEASE....BRING IT ON! I am ready for you. THE WORLD IS READY FOR YOU....BRING IT!
I am cold. I am tired. I am cold and tired. I just broke up with my boyfriend winter a few days ago (even though the restraining order and stern letter didn't seem to get to him) and I am in need of some HOT lovin'. :)
Waiting for you....
Kristin
Will you be my boyfriend faster than normal? I know you are fast, furious and come on to me like a hot locomotive most of the time. Please, please, PLEASE....BRING IT ON! I am ready for you. THE WORLD IS READY FOR YOU....BRING IT!
I am cold. I am tired. I am cold and tired. I just broke up with my boyfriend winter a few days ago (even though the restraining order and stern letter didn't seem to get to him) and I am in need of some HOT lovin'. :)
Waiting for you....
Kristin
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Breaking Up Is hard To Do
My open letter to Winter - my former boyfriend.
Dear Winter -
I love you. I really do. You come in with such gracefulness each year into my life that sometimes I don't even recognize your presence. You bring Bald Eagles to look at, great sunsets to admire, and a time to remember that life is a cycle. As much as I do love you and appreciate your snowy days to build snowmen with my girls, the cold nights to snuggle with Big Grasshopper, and time to reflect and renew my life, I am breaking up with you.
I AM BREAKING UP WITH YOU!
Did you hear me?
WE ARE THROUGH.
As much as I appreciate all you have done for me this year, I am over you. Tired. Cold. Done. I mean DONE. Did you hear me? DONE.
Thank you so much for loving me with your blustery cold winds whipping around me like a snuggly hug. Thank you for pelting my face with snow like a sloppy wet kiss. Thank you so much for bringing me all the blessings that you know how to bring, but we are done. Please stay at least 1056000 feet away from my house. This will help both of us. Please know that I like to dance in the nude under the light of the moon and stars to the weather goddess (more to drive my neighbors and parents/in-laws crazy) but that does not mean that I need you to return even if the weather goddess thinks you need to.
Thank you so much for your time. I am sorry I have to break up with you this way but there doesn't seem to be a better way seeing how you turned off your iPhone or changed your number or something. I hope you understand I love you, we just can't be together any more.
Love always.... now just go away....
Kristin
Dear Winter -
I love you. I really do. You come in with such gracefulness each year into my life that sometimes I don't even recognize your presence. You bring Bald Eagles to look at, great sunsets to admire, and a time to remember that life is a cycle. As much as I do love you and appreciate your snowy days to build snowmen with my girls, the cold nights to snuggle with Big Grasshopper, and time to reflect and renew my life, I am breaking up with you.
I AM BREAKING UP WITH YOU!
Did you hear me?
WE ARE THROUGH.
As much as I appreciate all you have done for me this year, I am over you. Tired. Cold. Done. I mean DONE. Did you hear me? DONE.
Thank you so much for loving me with your blustery cold winds whipping around me like a snuggly hug. Thank you for pelting my face with snow like a sloppy wet kiss. Thank you so much for bringing me all the blessings that you know how to bring, but we are done. Please stay at least 1056000 feet away from my house. This will help both of us. Please know that I like to dance in the nude under the light of the moon and stars to the weather goddess (more to drive my neighbors and parents/in-laws crazy) but that does not mean that I need you to return even if the weather goddess thinks you need to.
Thank you so much for your time. I am sorry I have to break up with you this way but there doesn't seem to be a better way seeing how you turned off your iPhone or changed your number or something. I hope you understand I love you, we just can't be together any more.
Love always.... now just go away....
Kristin
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Snow Day
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!....but please hurry up and plow it up so we can get back to the grind that is/was/and always will be. This should be how the song really goes.
I am not saying I am not enjoying having the girls PP and PP around 24/7 fighting, laughing, fighting, crying, hitting, pushing, laughing, crying, laughing, and generally just being themselves. I am not saying that I have not enjoyed listening to the girls fight about who is going to be Mrs. W and who is going to be Mrs. G (Peppermint's teacher and the intern in her class right now) as they play school. I am not going to say that I am not enjoying watching hours and hours and HOURS of Dora, Olivia, Dino Dan, Sesame, and any other show that comes on PBS or Nick Jr. I am not saying I am not enjoying ALL time it takes to get the girls dressed and undressed just so they can spend 5-10 minutes outside before wanting to come in because it is bitterly cold. I am not saying I am not enjoying Facebooking endless times during the day. I am not saying I am not enjoying hanging out, slacking off, and doing whatever I want. I am not saying I am not enjoying not having to drive PP and PP to and from school and whatever activity that is going on during the day. I am not saying I am not enjoying the snow.....but I am over it. OVER IT. OVER IT!
At this point school will be in session until the second week in June. At this point we are eating into lake/raft/camping time and everyone knows how much I LOVE lake/raft/camping time. At this point we are eating into SUMMER. SUMMER....so as much as I love the to sing "let it snow, let it snow, let it snow," I am OVER IT....and THAT IS what I am saying....
I am not saying I am not enjoying having the girls PP and PP around 24/7 fighting, laughing, fighting, crying, hitting, pushing, laughing, crying, laughing, and generally just being themselves. I am not saying that I have not enjoyed listening to the girls fight about who is going to be Mrs. W and who is going to be Mrs. G (Peppermint's teacher and the intern in her class right now) as they play school. I am not going to say that I am not enjoying watching hours and hours and HOURS of Dora, Olivia, Dino Dan, Sesame, and any other show that comes on PBS or Nick Jr. I am not saying I am not enjoying ALL time it takes to get the girls dressed and undressed just so they can spend 5-10 minutes outside before wanting to come in because it is bitterly cold. I am not saying I am not enjoying Facebooking endless times during the day. I am not saying I am not enjoying hanging out, slacking off, and doing whatever I want. I am not saying I am not enjoying not having to drive PP and PP to and from school and whatever activity that is going on during the day. I am not saying I am not enjoying the snow.....but I am over it. OVER IT. OVER IT!
At this point school will be in session until the second week in June. At this point we are eating into lake/raft/camping time and everyone knows how much I LOVE lake/raft/camping time. At this point we are eating into SUMMER. SUMMER....so as much as I love the to sing "let it snow, let it snow, let it snow," I am OVER IT....and THAT IS what I am saying....
Monday, January 31, 2011
The Weather
"If you can't change it, go with it." - Kristin
This is my weather motto. I know my parents (Gigi and Popi) and Big Grasshopper's parents (Nana and Papa) think I have something to do with the weather and what falls from the sky....I will say that just because I dance outside naked at night to The Weather Goddess from the North Pole under the moon and stars, this does not mean I have anything to do with what falls outside. I just like to dance naked outside at night under the moon and stars and I think that should be fine. (TMI I know....sorry....and if you believe any of the above, please let me sell you some ocean front property right on Beaver Lake.) Anyways....
My real weather philosophy is very simple. "If you can't change it, go with it." We can't change it. If I were in charge it would be 90-100 most days and all of us could live on a body of water and hang out all day fishing, swimming, and floating in our rafts as the drink man brings us cold drinks when needed. We would also have private chef's that make us breakfast, lunch, and dinner and we would never have to lift a finger. But, because I seem NOT to be in charge, please note that their is an EPICALLY HISTORIC snow storm coming and you better get ready....or go out and do a little naked dancing of your own to your own weather god/goddess under the light of the moon and stars....but you better hurry....because snow is coming!
Happy Dancing!!
This is my weather motto. I know my parents (Gigi and Popi) and Big Grasshopper's parents (Nana and Papa) think I have something to do with the weather and what falls from the sky....I will say that just because I dance outside naked at night to The Weather Goddess from the North Pole under the moon and stars, this does not mean I have anything to do with what falls outside. I just like to dance naked outside at night under the moon and stars and I think that should be fine. (TMI I know....sorry....and if you believe any of the above, please let me sell you some ocean front property right on Beaver Lake.) Anyways....
My real weather philosophy is very simple. "If you can't change it, go with it." We can't change it. If I were in charge it would be 90-100 most days and all of us could live on a body of water and hang out all day fishing, swimming, and floating in our rafts as the drink man brings us cold drinks when needed. We would also have private chef's that make us breakfast, lunch, and dinner and we would never have to lift a finger. But, because I seem NOT to be in charge, please note that their is an EPICALLY HISTORIC snow storm coming and you better get ready....or go out and do a little naked dancing of your own to your own weather god/goddess under the light of the moon and stars....but you better hurry....because snow is coming!
Happy Dancing!!
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